The "D" Word

Yup, that's right: Disability--dun, dun dun....

So, here's the thing... people are always asking me if I get offended when people ask why I'm in a wheelchair. The answer is no! The way I see it, my disability is in a way a blessing. So many people in our world are concerned only with what a person looks like physically. Having a disability, I think I have had the chance to disregard what people look like on the outside and simply look at them as an individual.... what they think, what they feel, etc. Without my disability, I am afraid that I would be as shallow as a lot of people out there (so thankfully I don't have the option). I'm not by any means saying that my disability gives me this super power of looking at peoples souls or something.... I just think that, because I understand what it is like to be stared at and considered different from everyone else, I am able to look past a lot of that stuff. Besides, if we were all the same, the world would be a pretty boring and pointless place (I know it sounds cliche, but its true).

The coolest thing in the world to me is when a little kid comes up to me and asks "what are you sitting in?" or when my little cousins come up to me and say "hey, get out of your wheelchair! i want to ride in it!!". To me, they are the ones who really look at me for who I am.... they aren't afraid that they are going to say the wrong thing or something that will "offend me". One of my biggest pet peeves is people who have disabilities who do get offended when people ask them questions. I mean, how else are people going to find out about them and see them for who they really are rather than defining them by their limitations rather than seeing their true character?

Another big pet peeve of mine is when people are carrying on a normal conversation with me and say something like "Do you wanna walk over to the library" and then get red in the face and look as sheepish as if they have just been caught speeding. Why on earth would I be offended by a figure of speech? I'm not fragile- I'm a person just like them . That would be like me thinking that a person would get offended by me saying that I like to race down hills just because they can't do it too. Now, HOW ridiculous would that be?! Of course I appreciate that people want to be respectful and polite, but I think being politically correct has gone too far. That being said, there are a few phrases that just sound lame when you say them to someone in a wheelchair:

1. "You need a motor on that thing!"--just because you may not like getting a workout or seeing me struggle up a hill, doesn't mean that I shouldn't stay in shape as long as I'm able.
2. "Slow down, or I'm gonna have to give you a speeding ticket!"-- I thought this was kinda obvious, but apparently I need to clarify that I'm not driving a car.
3. Ok, this one isn't a phrase, but it's very applicable: Parents, I have NEVER IN MY LIFE run over a child and never intend to. Therefore, you don't need to forcefully drag your children out of the way when I'm behind them. Having legs that don't work doesn't keep my eyes from seeing your children in my path.

Here's a few things that mean a lot to someone in a wheelchair (well, to me at least):

1. If at all possible, I really like it when someone sits down when they're talking to me. It gets a little tiring when you have to constantly look up at people when you talk to them.
2. If I do appear to be struggling up a hill, sometimes I am tired and would really appreciate a push. If you offer, I'll let you know if I need help or not.
3. In general, ask if I need help. Don't just automatically assume that I'm decrepit, but I admit that sometimes I'm a bit too proud to ask for help when I do need it.

I guess that what I am saying is that I don't consider myself much different from anyone else. It may come as a shock to some people, but most days I totally forget that I have a disability!! That's right. I'm that girl in a wheelchair who has to take a second to figure out why people are staring at me.